I am not one of those people with cool stories about seeing energy, hearing spirits and angels, seeing the future and knowing my Divine purpose since I was a kid. Instead, my story is filled with “real-life” challenges, devoid of what most people consider as spiritual or magical.
Most of my childhood was spent caught up in very real world issues:
being bullied at school
dealing with obesity
immigrating to the States from the Philippines against my will
getting kicked out by my mom because I chose to have a baby at 19
learning how to be a self-sufficient adult in a healthy relationship
fumbling my way through motherhood
It wasn’t until my mid-20s that I eventually found a meaningful career that felt truly purposeful. As I read an article about Florence Nightingale one day, my heart felt like it cracked open, tears started flowing and in that moment, I decided to become a nurse. Without any savings I quit my marketing job, finally got a college degree and became a critical care nurse.
Over the next 12 years in the ICU, I was immersed in highly charged, emotionally demanding situations that called for compassion, empathic communication and supportive care- traits that my youth trained me for and now came naturally for me. Dealing with death, patients in physical, mental and emotional crisis, worried and grieving family members, and stressed out co-workers on a regular basis stirred up the deep well of compassion in me. Witnessing and handling these powerful moments of human vulnerability gave me the opportunity to practice the healing art of holding space, even in the most painful and uncomfortable situations.
My compassion, appreciation for life and respect for the transcendence of death deepened even further when I became a patient myself, massively bleeding after giving birth to my second child. My near death experience, however, did not come with any magical experiences. It just left me with questions.
Despite all of the profound “real world” experiences I had gone through up to this point, my story of spiritual awakening didn’t come until later and might even seem trivial to some. Being overweight for most of my life, there was a period of my life in my early 30s when everything seemed to come together so perfectly. I was energized, felt full of life, lost weight and felt beautiful, and totally motivated to show up for life everyday with a smile. That feeling was snuffed out like a candle one day when my purse got stolen. I lost motivation, my energy dropped, I gained weight and felt so empty. I struggled and tried EVERYTHING to get that feeling back.
For the next three years I scoured through old pictures, old posts, old journal entries trying to find the perfect formula to get that spark back. I dieted and worked out and lost even more weight, but that didn’t do it. I went to the other end of the spectrum and indulged all my vices, thinking it would make me feel better, but none of them did. I felt even worse, constantly yearning for that perfect me that I used to be. Eventually, I just stopped trying.
Then one day I opened an email for a $35 deal for a psychic reading. I figured I didn’t have much to lose, so I scheduled a reading. Although I was highly skeptical of the information I received, our conversation that day activated something in me. I felt like Alice in Wonderland as the world I knew became a vast playground for me to explore.
I allowed my curiosity and passion to heal others to lead the way as I dove into exploring energy healing, my innate “superpowers”, and understanding my intuitive connection. Exploring the mysterious intangible helped me to make sense of the physical world. I encouraged my child-like sense of wonder and began to see the Divine in the everyday moments, places, things and interactions with people around me. With this new found experience and knowledge, I was driven to save the world.
Over the years and through my experience, I learned that carrying the weight of saving and healing others is not sustainable nor is it what I’m here for. In my own path to heal myself and realize my wholeness, I’ve learned that true healing doesn’t come from others. It can only come from within.
And so my focus over the last several years has shifted from taking it upon myself to heal others to helping others heal themselves. Although my methods are multi-dimensional, and some might say weird or magical, I make the experience and understanding very down-to-Earth for practical use in your everyday life. I take the opportunity in every seemingly “normal” everyday moment and interaction to deepen my compassion, wonder, gratitude, joy, understanding, love of life and connection to the Divine. In sharing myself, my gifts, my service, my knowledge and my story I hope to encourage others to do the same.